Commonly used office Phrases what they mean

Commonly used office Phrases what they mean
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Commonly Used Phrases at the Office and what they really mean!

1. For your information, please. (FYI)
Meaning: I don't know what to do with this, so please keep it.

2. Noted and returned.
Meaning: I don't know what to do with this, so please keep it little while.

3. Review and comment.
Meaning: Do the dirty work so that I can forward it.

4. Action please.
Meaning: Get yourself involved for me. Don't worry, I'll claim the credit.

5. For your necessary action.
Meaning: It's your headache now.

6. Copy to.
Meaning: Here's a share of my headache.

7. For your approval, please.
Meaning: Put your neck on the chopping board for me please.

8. Action is being taken.
Meaning: Your correspondence is lost and I am trying to locate it.

9. Your letter is receiving our attention.
Meaning: I am trying to figure out what you want.

10. Please discuss.
Meaning: I don't know what the hell this is, so please brief me.

11. For your immediate action.
Meaning: Do it NOW! Or I will get into serious trouble.

12. Please reply soon.
Meaning: Please be efficient. It makes me look inefficient.

13. We are investigating/ processing your request with the relevant authorities.
Meaning: They are causing the delay, not us.

14. Regards.
Meaning: Thanks and bless you for reading all the crap.

Just a LAUGH : Ultimate joke of the day :P

One fine morning a man was leaving a cafe after his morning coffee, when he

noticed a most unusual funeral procession A funeral coffin was followed by

a second one about 50 feet behind the first.

Behind the second coffin was a solitary man walking with a black dog.

Behind him was a queue of about 2000 men walking in a single line.

The man couldn't stand his curiosity.

He approached the man walking with the dog, "I am so sorry for your loss,

and I know now is a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a

funeral like this with so many of you walking in single line. Whose

funeral is it? "

The man replied, "Well, that first coffin is for my wife. "

What happened to her? "

The man replied, "My dog attacked and killed her. "

He inquired further, "Well, who is in the second coffin? "

The man answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife  when

the dog attacked and killed her also. "

A thoughtful moment of silence passes between the two men.

Then the first one asks in excitement "Can I borrow the dog? "

                                             

The man calmly replied "Join the queue".