My SMS Collections - Set 1 : Send SMS to your friends.

My SMS Collections:
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 बॉस गुस्से में: तुमने कभी उल्लू देखा है?
कार्यकारी (सिर झुका): नहीं सर
बॉस: नीचे क्या तुम देख रहे हो? मेरी तरफ देखो.

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Student क्या जाने प॓पर का क्या होगा, मार्क्स मिलेंगे या zeroमे tie होगा।
कोई ना जाने अपना result क्या होगा, तो GF घुमा, पैसे उड़ा,
पैसे उड़ा के बोल ............ऑल आर फैल
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फूलों मे कमल
प॓पर मे नकल
समारोह मे ताली
मज़ाक के लिये साली
गहनो मे सोना
छुपने के लिये कोना
प्यार मे ग़म
और दोस्ती मे हम
Famous है !!!
 -------------------------------------------
आज है कल ना जाने कहा जायेंगे ।
हम वो परिंदे है, जो आसमान में खो जायेंगे।।।।
दिलों की डोर से ना बंधो हमें ।।
कल हम ना होंगे तो आंसू निकल आयेंगे।।।।
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Beautiful pictures are developed from negatives in dark room.
So, if anytime u see darkness in ur life, it means God is developinG A BEAUTIFUL FUTURE FOR U.
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Santa Banta jokes : Must read

Letter from Banta Singh to Mr. Bill Gates


Subject: Problems with my new computer


Dear Mr. Bill Gates,


We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems, which I want to bring to your notice:


1. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you to check this.


2. One doubt is whether any “re-scooter” is available in system? I find only “re-cycle”, but I own a scooter at my home.


3. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot trace the key with this 'find' button, but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem.


4. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when you will provide that?


5. I bought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows 'My Computer': when you will provide the remaining items?


6. It is surprising that windows says 'MY Pictures' but there is not even a single photo of mine. So when will you keep my photo in that.


7. There is 'MICROSOFT OFFICE' what about 'MICROSOFT HOME' since I use the PC at home only.


8. You provided 'My Recent Documents'. When you will provide 'My Past Documents'?


9. You provide 'My Network Places'. For God sake please do not provide 'My Secret Places'. I do not want to let my wife know where I go after my office hours.


Regards,
Banta


Last one to Mr. Bill Gates:


Sir, how is it that your name is Gates but you are selling WINDOWS?

Employee Kaun Hai.... Must read : Funny jokes on boss and employee

Employee woh hai

jo aksar fasta hai

interviews ke sawaal me

badi companiyon ke jal me

boss aur client ke bawaal me

Employee woh hai

jise intezaar hai

weekend night par dhoom machane

ka

boss ke chhuti par jane ka

increment ki khabar aane ka

Employee woh hai

jo sochta hai

kaash padhai par dhyaan diya

hota

kaash teacher se panga na liya

hota

kaash ishq na kiya hota.....

Employee woh hai

jo pak gaya hai

meetings ki jhelai me

submissions ki gehraai me

teamwork ki chataai me

Employee woh hai

jo laga rahta hai

schedule ko fislane me

targets ko khiskane me

roz naye naye bahane banaane me

Employee woh hai

jo lunch time me breakfast leta

hai

dinner time me lunch karta hai

aur

commutation ke waqt soya karta

hai

Employee woh hai

jo paagal hai

chai aur samose ke pyaar mey

cigarette ke khumar mey

birdwatching ke wichaar mey

Employee woh hai

jo khoya hai

reminders ke jawab me

na milne wale hisab me

Behtar bhavisya ke khwab me

Speech by Chetan Bhagat in Symbiosis : Must read

Speech by Chetan Bhagat at Symbiosis ...must read...

Don’t just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.
There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.
"Life is one of those races in nursery school where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same is with life where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die. ……………….
One thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. Life is not meant to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? …………….
It's ok, bunk a few classes, scoring low in couple of papers, goof up a few interviews, take leave from work, fall in love, little fights with your spouse. We are people, not programmed devices........." :) 

"Don't be serious, be sincere."!!

Funny Joke : Mast forwarded email ..

A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room,
so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife.


However, he accidentally typed a wrong e-mail address, and without
realizing
his error, he sent the e-mail.


Meanwhile.... Somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned from her
husband's funeral. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting
condolence messages from relatives and friends.


After reading the first message, she fainted. The widow's son rushed into
the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which
read:

-----------------------------------------------------------

To: My Loving Wife,

Subject: I've reached

Date: 16 March 2008,



I know you're surprised to hear from me. They give computers here, and we
Are allowed to send e-mails to loved ones.

I've just reached and have been checked in.
I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

Looking forward to seeing you TOMORROW!

Love,
Youre Hubby.

Too Fuuny joke : Must read from top to bottom slowly....

MAIN TUMSE EK BAAT PUCHNA CHAHTi HOON,









BAHUT DINO SE YEH BAAT MERE DIL MAIN THI,













LEKIN KABHI HIMMAT NAHI HUI,














KYUN KI MUJHKO DARR THA KI ,































TUM BURA NA MAAN JAO,












LEKIN MUJHKO AB KOI PARWAAH NAHI HAI ,












AB MAINE FAISLA KAR LIYA ,











MAIN TUMSE











PUCH KAR RAHUNGi.







HO SAKTA HAI KI TUMKO ACHHA NA LAGE,









LEKIN MUJHKO JAWAAB JARUR DENA,









TUMKO APNI DOSTI KI KASAM,











PLz MUJHE BATAO,








HUM











































CHLORMINT KYON KHATE HAIN..........!








































































OR MELODY ITNI CHOCOLATI KYO HOTI HAI

Lovely forwarded Email : Keep Smiling

♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥¯`♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥¯`♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥friends ♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥..................added
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥enemies♥
♥´¯`♥.....................subtracted
♥happiness ♥
♥´¯`♥ ..........multiplied
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥ sadness♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥.........divided
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥¯`♥
♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥´¯`♥¯`♥ keep smiling

Very emotional Hindi Urdu shayari Ghazal

दिन हुआ है तो रात भी होगी,
हो मत उदास कभी तो बात भी होगी,
इतने प्यार से दोस्ती की है खुदा की कसम
जिंदगी रही तो मुलाकात भी होगी.

कोशिश कीजिए हमें याद करने की
लम्हे तो अपने आप ही मिल जायेंगे
तमन्ना कीजिए हमें मिलने की
बहाने तो अपने आप ही मिल जायेंगे .

महक दोस्ती की इश्क से कम नहीं होती
इश्क से ज़िन्दगी ख़तम नहीं होती
अगर साथ हो ज़िन्दगी में अच्छे दोस्त का
तो ज़िन्दगी जन्नत से कम नहीं होती

सितारों के बीच से चुराया है आपको
दिल से अपना दोस्त बनाया है आपको
इस दिल का ख्याल रखना
क्योंकि इस दिल के कोने में बसाया है आपको .

अपनी ज़िन्दगी में मुझे शरिख समझना
कोई गम आये तो करीब समझना
दे देंगे मुस्कराहट आंसुओं के बदले
मगर हजारों दोस्तो में अज़ीज़ समझना ..

हर दुआ काबुल नहीं होती ,
हर आरजू पूरी नहीं होती ,
जिन्हें आप जैसे दोस्त का साथ मिले ,
उनके लिए धड़कने भी जरुरी नहीं होती

Very emotional hindi poem : Must read

जिसकी ज़रूरत हर किसी को हुई है,
गुजार के देखो कभी अकेले ज़िन्दगी,
फिर खुद जान जाओगे के दोस्ती के बिना ज़िन्दगी भी अधूरी है.

कीसी का दिल तूदना हमारी आदत नहीं
कीसी का दिल दुखाना हमारी फिरात नहीं
भरोसा रखना हम पर तुम
दोस्त कह कर कीसी को यूह,हम बदलते नहीं

हर कुशी दिल के करीब नहीं होती,
ज़िन्दगी घुमो से दूर नहीं होती,
आये दोस्त मेरी दोस्ती को संभल कर रक,
हमारी दोस्ती हर किसी को नसीब नहीं होती...

तेरी दोस्ती हम इस तरह निधायेंगे तुम रोज़ खफा होना
हम रोज़ मनायेंगे पर मान जाना मनाने से
वरना यह भीगी पलकें ले के कहा जायेंगे..

इतना प्यार पाया है आप से...
उस से ज्यादा पाने को जी चाहता है...
नजाने वो कौन सी खोबी है आप में.
की अप से दोस्ती निभाने को जी चाहता है. 

small gift 4 u....
....._.;_'.-._
...{`--..-.'_,}
.{;..\,__...-'/}
.{..'-`.._;..-';
....`'--.._..-'|
........,--\\..,-"-.
........`-..\(..'-...\
...............\.;---,/
..........,-""-;\
......../....-'.)..\
........\,---'`...\\
.....................\|...

Funny one : A computer program for friends

/program 4 my Friends testi !!!!
#include
void main( )
{
char choice;
cout<<"do u wanna know bout my friend?";
cout<<"enter ur choice yes/no";
cin>>choice;
if(choice=="yes")
{
cout<<"abb mein apne dost ki tareef khud kya karu....well go thru all his testi's
and u will come 2 know hw good my friend is";
}
else
{
cout<<"thanx 4 visiting my friends profile";
}
cout<<"hey dud though ur friend being a ......... but has tried his level best 2
frame this testi especially 4 u.....
as a b'day gift...hope u like it !!!";
}

Scrap for Orkut : SHOOTOUT AT ORKUTWALA

SHOOTOUT AT ORKUTWALA

ganpat.. chal scrap bhej..
a ganpat.. chal scrap bhej..
a jada joke serious thoda kum bhej..
a jada joke serious thoda kum bhej..

thoda fan van to apun ka bhi ban na yaar..
thoda fan van to apun ka bhi ban na yaar..

a ganpat ganpat...
a ganpat ganpat...

COMEON COMEON COME EVERYBODY
COMEON COMEON COME BE MY BUDDY
COMEON COMEON COME EVERYBODY
{send a scrap.>send a scrap.>send a scrap.>}

IN THE ORKUT.. ALL OVER INDIA...
WE ARE THE BHAI..
WE ARE THE BHAI..



orkut-orkut chalta rehta hai dekho jidhar..
koi scraping koi chatting karta hai idhar..
orkut-orkut chalta rehta hai dekho jidhar..
koi scraping koi chatting karta hai idhar..

thoda joke-woke to apun ko bhi bhej na yaar..
thoda joke-woke to apun ko bhi bhej na yaar..

a ganpat ganpat...
a ganpat chal... scrap bhej..

Haapy Birthday : Nice forwarded email

*. * . * . * . * . * . * . * . * . * . * . * . *
*. * . * . * . * . * .!!! * . * . * . * . *
*. * .*_/\_ *. * . * . * . * . * . * . * . * .*
. *. * <," > * MANY MANY MANY * . * .
* , + .*... * . * . * . * . * . * . * . * . * . *
* . * . * . *  _/\_. * . HAPPY RETURNS * . *
* . * . * . * <;,"> . * . * . * . * . * . *. * . *
+ * . *. * . * . * . * . * . OF THE day* .
* . _/\_ * . * . * * . * . * . * .
:
:
:
:
:
----------------()---()--()—()—()
-----------------||---||—||—||—|
--------------{*~*~*~*~*~*~*}
---------@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
--------{~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~}
---@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
---{~*~*~*~*~HAPPY~*~*~*~*~*~}
---{~*~*~*~~BIRTH DAY! ~~*~~*~*}
---{~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*~*~*~*}
---@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
--------------------)---------(
------------_____,-----------,____
-----------/_________________

Friendship email : What is a friendship?

Friendship Is Like... NOKIA!
Connecting People!

Friendship Is Like... SAMSUNG
Every One Is Invited!

Friendship Is Like... CELL ONE
Changing Life Style!

Friendship Is Like... PHILIPS
Lets Makes Things Better!

Friendship Is Like... TAPAL
Jaisay Chaho Jeoooo!

Friendship Is Like... SPRITE
Sirf Yeh Bhujaye Pyas Baki All Bakwass!

Friendship Is Like... PEPSI
Ask For More!

Friendship Is Like... LG
Digitally Yours!

Friendship Is Like... NIKE
Just Do It!

Friendship Is Like... HABIB
Kyoun Kay Ye Dil Ka Mamla Hai!

Friendship Is Like... WAVES
Naam Hi Kafi Hai!

Friendship Is Like... BUTTER SCOTCH (hmmm)
Chalti Jayee Chalti Jayee Chali Jayeeeee!

Friendship Is Like... COCA COLA
Enjoyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

But my frndship is like LIC
Zindagi k sath bhi n
Zindagi k baad bhiiiii

Funny Sardar jokes : Interview of a sardar

nterviewer :Let me check your word Power...

Sardaar :Ok Sir ....

Interviewer : Tell me the opposite of .....good.

Sardar :hmmmm..... Bad

Interviewer : Come

Sardar : Go.

Interviewer : Ugly.

Sardar : Pichlli.

Interviewer : PICHLLIIIII?

Sardar : UGLYYYYYYYYY..

Interviewer : Shut Up.

Sardar : Keep Talking.

Interviewer :ok now stop these all..

sardaar:ok now carry on this all

Interviewer :abe...chup ho ja..chup ho ja..chup ho jaaaa

sardaar:abe bolta rah..bolta rah..bolta rahhh

Interviewer :Areeee yaaar

sardaar: areeee dushmannnnnn

Interviewer : Get Out.

Sardar : Come In.

Interviewer : Oh my God.

Sardar : Oh my Devil.

Interviewer : U r Rejected.

sardaar: I m selected...

I M SELECTED???REALLY??BALLE BALLE

Funny Email : Dedicated to all engineers......

ना back की परवाह , ना subjects सारे clear हैं
यारों हम engineer हैं

ना job की tension ,ना future का कोई fear हैं
यारों हम engineer हैं


हाथ में किताबों की जगह , table पर beer हैं
यारों हम engineer हैं


c++,java नहीं chating अपना career हैं
यारों हम engineer हैं


late nite studies नहीं ,late night premier हैं
यारों हम engineer हैं


यहाँ कोई einstein नहीं,यहाँ पर सब shakespeer हैं
यारों हम engineer हैं


हम रहे भले चंगे ,चाहे देश की हालत severe हैं
यारों हम engineer हैं


माँ ने सोचा था ,मेरा बेटा engineer बनेगा
ले माँ तेरा बेटा आज engineer हैं


dedicated to all engineers......