Funny Email : How to look busy…..

How to look busy…..


Being busy with work and looking like it are two different things. Master the art of looking busy. Read on...






Never walk without a document
People with documents look hardworking. Those with nothing in their hands look like they're going to the cafeteria.






Carry loads of stuff home with you at night to show that you work longer hours than you really do.






Use computers to look busy
Any time you use a computer, it looks like 'work' to the casual observer.







If your boss catches you doing nothing official on the computer...
your best defense is to claim you're learning a new software to save money.







Messy desk
Build huge piles of documents around your workspace, only top management can get away with a clean desk.








Screen all your calls through voice mail
If somebody leaves a message for pending work, respond during lunch hour when you know they're not there.





Look impatient annoyed to give the impression that you're always busy.






Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. Make sure you walk past the boss' room on your way out.








Send important e-mails at unearthly hours (i.e. 9:35pm, 7:05am, etc.) during public holidays.





Creative sighing for effect
Sigh loudly when there are many people around, giving the impression that you are under extreme pressure.








It is not enough to pile lots of documents on the table. Put lots of books on the floor, etc. (thick computer manuals are the best).







Read computer magazines pick out all the jargon new products. Use the phrases freely when in conversation with bosses.








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Friends

Friendship is not about "I m sorry "  its about "abbe  teri  galti hai "
 
Friendship is not about "I m there for u" or "I missed u "  it's about "kahan marr gaya saale  "
 
Friendship is not about "I understand "  its about "sab teri wajah se hua manhus"
 
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John and his Brain : too Funny story :)

John and his Brain : too Funny story :)

John was waiting for his Love..

"30 minutes late!!", his brain shouted at him, "Last time you were 5
mins late and she had literally gobbled u up ... remember??"

"Yeah yeah", he said to his brain, "You know her ... all moody and
stuff .... oh there she is"
"Scold her OK?", his brain adviced.
"OK I will try"
Sweet Sheetal comes with the cutest smile and says "Im sorry honey ...
I was shopping for shoes ... totally forgot about you"
"What if you had said that line buddy?", shouted his brain .... "she
would have had a nervous breakdown"

John ignored his brain .. "Its OK honey .. its only half an hour .. no problem"
She smiled once again .. held his hand and asked "Hope you remember
what occasion is today"

"OMG!!!", thought John .....
"Brain ... search database for reminders, anniversaries, silly
anniversaries, birthdays and birthdays of people I dont care about"

Brain got into action ... he started delegating work to different
parts ... parallel processing .. multiple search .......... complete
memory scan.

Sheetal stared at John .... "Hello!! u have been staring at me for 2
minutes now ... u OK?"

"Huh!!!", he said, "Oh ... nothing's wrong .. was lost in thought"

"No records found", said the brain ...

"Damn!!", thought John

"So what say ... how do we celebrate this day?", she asked.
John is all confused ... "Ask her ...dumbo?". said the brain

"OK OK ...stop pushing me"

"Honey .. U know my lousy memory .. I guess I cant recall what today is"

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT T!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!" , she shouted ... and started crying.

"How could you forget!! ..... its my doggy's birthday"

"!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!"

A moment of silence.

His entire brain staff was laughing at him.

John was dumbfounded.
"What the hell am I supposed to do know?", he asked his brain.

"Damage control sequence initialized ... dont worry our specialist
will comeback with the perfect line to make everything all right"

"Better do it fast ..brainy"

The brain was working at 90% capacity ..... gathering and analyzing all
data on 'How to handle women?'

Finally an answer was computed and communicated to John.

He looked up to her, and said "Of Course I remember your doggie's birthday
... how can I forget that sweet mutt's special day"

She looked up with utter surprise ...
"HUH!!!!!!! ....... Doggy is the name of my cat you jerk"
She stood up angrily and left.
John and his brain were left there clueless ....